Relationships and Addiction Treatment Part 1: Rebuilding Relationships In Recovery

Addiction is a disease that can hurt the person suffering from it and those around them. Substance use disorders (SUDs) cause people to do things that damage their close relationships. SUDs often cause people to miss important events, miss work, lose control of finances, and act irrationally.

We all know that once trust is breached in any type of relationship, it takes work to rebuild it. Taking accountability and being introspective in order to repair relationships is part of addiction recovery. 

In inpatient facilities, though you may not have much access to your loved ones, you'll likely undergo family therapy. The purpose is to start rebuilding relationships while in recovery.

Getting Treatment for Addiction is Just the First Step

Some say that the best apology is changed behavior. While addiction treatment is obviously a momentous and positive step for the person in treatment, it can be a valuable thing for that person’s family and friends.

The hurt caused by addiction can’t be mended while that person is still engaging in that behavior. Getting treatment is the first step for a person to improve their life. It’s also the first step for showing their loved ones that they’re putting in work to do better. 

Everyone goes to rehab for different reasons. No matter what that reason is, improving relationships is an outcome.

image: a couple lying on a stone in the sunshine. One is on his back while his partner lies on his stomach. Text: The hurt caused by addiction can't be mended while that person is still engaging in that behavior.e

Family Therapy During Treatment

The closest relationships a person has are vital to the recovery process. In recovery, family therapy is often a large part of the treatment plan. Tight and important bonds have a huge effect on a person’s mental wellbeing, and they play a part during someone’s entire life. It makes sense to bring them into the therapy process during recovery.

Family therapy helps those in addiction recovery begin the process of reconnecting and rebuilding relationships. But it also helps the family understand the recovery process and how to be the best support system possible.

Read our full guide on family therapy for a more in-depth look at its effectiveness and different approaches.

What to Expect From Family Therapy

Family therapy is generally a fairly intimate type of counseling that involves only the therapist, the person in recovery, and a small group of their chosen family members. 

Only Chosen Family Are Involved

The phrase “chosen family” is key here. While many people do have quite positive and supportive relationships with blood relatives, many do not. In fact, many have quite toxic relationships with their parents, siblings, and extended family, so bringing them into the recovery journey might be detrimental. 

At Sequoia Behavioral Health, family therapy involves whoever the client wants to involve. This could be close friends and mentors who they consider family. It’s important that those involved in family therapy are people the client can depend on outside of inpatient treatment.

Image: a photo of a couple from the neck down holding hands while standing in front of some greenery. Text: Family therapy only involves who the client wants. Chosen family are as valid as blood relatives to support someon through recovery

Address Past, Present, and Future Relationships

One of the goals of family therapy is to understand the past so you can have a brighter future. The client and their chosen family will work with the therapist to gain perspectives, apologize if needed, show gratitude, and then learn how they can support each other going forward.

Many times in relationships that feature addiction, enabling and codependency can be issues. Part of learning healthy ways to move forward is learning what these behaviors look like, and how to be supportive without them.

Related resource: Codependency and Enabling: What is Enabling?

What You Can Work on During Family Therapy

While the family will learn how to support their loved one and how to resolve past feelings, the path of the client in recovery may look a little different.

They’ll still address things that they weren’t happy with in their relationships heading into recovery, and if they believe any toxic behavior from family members contributed to their addiction or mental health challenges, they can work to resolve that as well. 

There will be some work in terms of apologies and atonement. Addiction often causes heartaches and burdens for those with a loved one with an SUD. The client will have to show their chosen family that they deserve trust again. 

The client also needs to remember that healthy support may look different than what they are used to before they started recovery. They’ll have to work with the therapist to understand that support from their family isn’t blind. Everyone is on this recovery journey together, and they can overcome any bumps in the road together.

no image. Text: what to do to rebuild relationships in recovery - address problematic behaviors from all parties, apologize for harm you may have caused in the past, and understand what healthy support looks like.

The Work Doesn’t Stop Once You Leave Treatment—Rebuilding Relationships After Addiction Treatment

While the chosen family that participates in family therapy may be considered among the most important people in that person’s life, they certainly aren’t the only relationships that need rebuilding. 

Another part of recovery and treatment is learning how to rebuild other relationships. How do you talk about recovery, or talk to casual acquaintances that you may have hurt before treatment? What do your workplace dynamics look like now?

Just like sobriety is often a life-long journey, rebuilding relationships after recovery can take time. And some might not be mended. What’s important is finding that chosen family and keeping them close.

Related resource: How to Help a Loved One in Recovery

Repair Relationships Through Addiction Treatment at Sequoia Behavioral Health

Rebuilding trust and addiction recovery are two incredibly difficult undertakings. However, they both lead to a happier and healthier life.

At Sequoia, we understand that repairing relationships in recovery is vital to not only the success of your treatment, but also your life after treatment. That’s why we include family therapy as part of the holistic programming for all of our clients.

Whether you’re struggling with addiction or mental health issues, Sequoia can help.

Call today to set up your initial consultation with our team.