Watching your loved one go through any type of crisis is hard. Watching them go through a crisis you may not fully understand is even more difficult.

Mental health crises are personal, and they may seem like someone is fighting an invisible demon. 

As someone on the outside looking in, remember while you can’t heal them yourselves, you can be a part of the healing journey. 

In this article, we’ll discuss:

• What a mental health crisis can look like
• What you can do for your loved one during a crisis
• How to take care of yourself during this process

What Does it Mean to Have a Mental Health Crisis?

Many people have a diagnosed mental health issue—about a quarter of the population, according to the National Institute of Mental Health. Symptoms range from very mild to very severe, impeding a person’s ability to live. They can ebb and flow, and they may begin later in a person’s life, or eventually subside. 

But what defines a crisis? A mental health crisis is when someone becomes a danger to themselves or others. This doesn’t have to look like violence necessarily. It can look like frequent panic attacks or panic attacks that require hospitalization. It can look like not being able to leave your house or take care of yourself. 

Any mental health disorder can lead to a crisis, and it may look different depending on what that person is going through or what disorder they have. 

On the other hand, a mental health crisis can happen to someone with no previous diagnosis. Experiencing trauma from things like…

• The loss of a loved one
• A natural disaster
• A car accident
• Assault 

…can all cause trauma that requires quick treatment. 

Read our full guide on trauma to learn what can cause it and how it affects people differently.

Learn to Identify Common Symptoms of Mental Health Crisis

You may have talked to your loved one about their symptoms and know how their mental illness usually affects them. Often, a mental health crisis can come in the form of intensified symptoms they normally have managed. 

However, there are some common signs that can happen no matter what the diagnosis a person has. They likely won't experience all of these, or they might experience them at different times.

Not Sleeping—Or Sleeping Too Much

Sleep and mental health are thoroughly connected. When one suffers, so does the other. Several common mental health disorders, including anxiety, happen when a person’s brain is overactive. This often leads to a loss of sleep. 

The other side of that same coin is sleeping too much. Sometimes, mental health issues are, quite simply, exhausting. In other cases, your brain enters a “holding pattern” and is understimulated, making it so that person sleeps excessively.

If your loved one talks about how they’re not sleeping, can’t stop sleeping, or you notice they’re more fatigued than usual, check in on them.

Read more about the connection between sleep and mental health.

Extreme Agitation and Anxiety

A huge part of many mental health disorders is poor emotional regulation, which means they become upset or agitated over seemingly small things and have a hard time returning to a neutral emotional baseline. 

If someone is becoming agitated more easily than usual, or seems more “high strung” than usual, that could be a sign that their mental health is deteriorating.

Trauma and emotional dysregulation are often related. Learn more about their connection.

Extreme Withdrawal

It’s not uncommon for someone going through mental health issues to withdraw from others—their symptoms might be getting scary, they’re worried about hurting someone, they don’t want to worry others, or they’re ashamed. For many reasons, people withdraw. During a crisis, the withdrawal is much more likely to be more intense, and can go on for a long time.

Experiencing Hallucinations and Delusions

Delusions and hallucinations are the defining symptoms of some disorders such as schizophrenia spectrum disorders and dissociative disorders. In extreme mental crises, someone without a history of hallucinations or delusions can experience them as well. 

Learn more about dissociative disorders and schizophrenic disorders to learn more about different psychosis symptoms. 

Mental health crises can often lead to addiction. Depending on the drug, excessive substance use can cause hallucinations or delusions. Those who use stimulants are especially at risk. Remember, addiction is a disease, and that person who abuses drugs needs mental health treatment, as well.

Threats or Attempts to Cause Harm

This is often when people understand that someone is in crisis. When someone says out loud that they want to hurt themselves or others, it’s time for action. Even if someone doesn’t have a plan in place, passively mentioning their desires for harming themselves or others is indicative of a crisis.

Learn the signs of passive suicidal ideation. If a loved one has talked about harming themselves or others, call 988 or 911 right away.

How to Care For A Loved One in a Mental Health Crisis

An important thing to remember when a loved one is going through a mental health crisis is that you aren’t responsible for them recovering or getting help.

That’s a hard truth for many people to swallow. But remember that you are responsible for showing this person you are there for support. You may not be able to walk them into the treatment facility door right then and there, but you can do small things that will help them in a crisis. 

Make Sure They’re Safe

The first thing to do to care for your loved one is to make sure they’re safe. Make sure you know where they are and who they are with. This could mean that you bring them to your home, or visit them at theirs.

If your loved one isolated themselves, check in on them, even if that means physically knocking on their door. In cases of isolation, also make sure they have food to eat and water to drink.

Make Sure You’re Safe

Once again, a mental health crisis can be defined when that person becomes a danger to themselves or others. If you feel like you’re in danger for any reason, it’s ok to call authorities and remove yourself from the situation.

Be With Them

Being with your loved one, physically in the same room, can go a long way. Sometimes, they may lash out and want to be alone, but often in a crisis, they need the support you can provide. You’re not only making sure they’re safe physically, but you’re showing them that you’re safe emotionally. 

When you’re with them, you can:

• Listen
• Ask questions
• Do activities with them
• Talk about innocent things
• Do some chores for them

The biggest thing to remember is to ask them what they want—what would make them feel happy in that moment, do they want physical touch, what can you help them with. You don’t need to infantilize them, you need to be a pillar of support.

 Call For Assistance

In some cases, the crisis can lead to bodily harm. If that’s the case, it’s probably best to reach out to a professional. They’re equipped to handle situations that you likely aren’t.

When the crisis is breaking down, and your loved one needs urgent help, call 911. Once you’re on the line, there are a few things to say to the dispatchers to make sure you get the right kind of support.

• Ask for an officer trained in crisis prevention
• If you suspect your loved one may attempt suicide by cop, tell the dispatcher about their plans

If you feel like your loved one has put you in danger or has threatened you with violence, you may have to make the tough decision to call emergency services from another location or leave before they get there.

Also, remember that there are many crisis hotlines available as well if someone’s safety isn’t immediately in question. Look up local crisis assistance groups to call. They may have resources and information on next steps to take to get your loved one help.

Do Research For Mental Health Treatment

Your loved one may or may not have considered mental health treatment yet. If they’re safe, look for treatment facilities that can take care of their needs. If you do it together or on your own, you look up and recommend treatment options. In some cases, you can support your loved one by reaching out to treatment facilities with their consent.

How to Avoid Compassion Fatigue 

Have you heard the phrase, “you can’t fill someone else’s cup when yours is empty”? Helping others is hard work. Especially when you’re invested in a relationship, you’re likely going to exert a lot of energy caring for them. 

Compassion fatigue is the mental exhaustion from caring for others. It’s common in certain jobs, like healthcare and law enforcement. 

You can only help someone when you have the energy to do so. Here are some ways to care for yourself so that you can support your loved one as best as possible.

Set Realistic Boundaries 

Sometimes, we just don’t have the means to help our loved ones completely. Make it clear to yourself as well as your loved one as to what you’re able to do. Even if you do have the monetary and timely means, it’s taxing to write an emotional blank check.

By setting realistic boundaries—something you can still do with care and empathy—you can let your loved one know the best way they can reach out to you in times of need. 

Practice Self Care

Self-care is a good way to refill your metaphorical cup. It’s a way to recuperate energy, clear your mind, and feel healthy. 

Self-care can look like “me time” activities like baths, spa days, and eating dessert for dinner. But it also includes:

• Getting enough food
• Staying hydrated
• Maintaining your schedule and routines
• Do things for only your enjoyment

Part of setting realistic boundaries is ensuring that caring for your loved one doesn’t interfere with you taking care of yourself.

Take a Step Back if Needed

If things become too much, there’s nothing wrong with taking a step back and letting others handle the crisis. 

You may feel like you’re abandoning your loved one. However, here are a few things to do before you take a step back:

• Set a time when you’ll check back in
• Make sure they have support and resources from others
• Communicate clearly what you’re experiencing

The last point about communication may be the most important. Ghosting someone or making up excuses to avoid them can exacerbate their mental health crisis symptoms. If you set them up with resources and talk to your loved about what you need and for how long, you still are supporting them through this difficult time

Next Steps: What To Do After Your Loved One Gets Help

The ideal next step in a mental health crisis is for your loved one to seek help from a professional. Whether they choose the traditional therapy route or they require something more intensive, like an inpatient stay, you can still be there for them.

Read our guide on what a person can do after a mental health breakdown or crisis.

Your loved one may ask you to join them in family therapy, even if you’re not related by blood. They may require help with their household while in an inpatient facility. And of course, they’ll still need love and support once they finish treatment.

Learn what you can expect from family therapy at Sequoia Behavioral Health.

Mental Health Treatment at Sequoia Behavioral Health

Our approach at Sequoia is holistic. When your loved one is going through a crisis, we’ll make sure they’re safe, their needs met, and they’re underlying issues are resolved. 

Learn more about our integrative and holistic mental health treatment program in Mesa, Arizona.

You’ve done admirably supporting their loved one through a mental health crisis. Now, it’s time to let our experienced and highly-trained staff create a treatment plan for them. 

Contact us to learn more about our treatment program. We’re here to answer your questions.